Normal is overrated. Why pick the same job as the rest, go to the same 9 to 5, order Chinese at the end of the day and make a mental note to buy your pet some food, when you can choose a wild career and stand out, while ordering Thai at the end of the day and getting food for your exotic pet turtle named Voldetort?
Well, we’re here to present some of the best and sure-to-start-a-conversation jobs out there, and what you should be studying to go and get them.
Studied Fashion Design? Become…
Teddy bear repair technician
Some of you cringed when you read this title, about the most pathetic and adorable job out there. Seeing how some of the teddy bears fabricated are either discontinued or are custom-made, there’s no wonder there is a need of specialised emergency workers, who can fix poor Teddy and make him or her whole again. With a degree in fashion and/or design, you are more than prepared to fight the ongoing ruptured button eye epidemic.
Ok, this might be the most awesome thing in the world, especially if you’re a fashion design graduate. You take one look at the person who hired you and, with all the freedom in the world, you are allowed to pick and choose their style, clothes, and so forth, shaping their public image.
This couldn’t get better, but it does: an estimated salary for such a career is up to 43.000 USD/year.
Studied Musical Arts? Become…
The Queen’s Piper
You can be, technically, a very glorified alarm clock. As part of the British Royal Household, you would play your bagpipe daily, every morning at 9, for 15 minutes, under the Queen’s window, probably ducking from a gilded slipper once in a while and trying not to take too personally the well-mannered curses from the Royal bedroom.
Studied Hospitality, Leisure & Sports? Become…
Big on travelling, having fun, and know the basics of swimming? Then we found the perfect career for you. It won’t just be fun and games: you will have to measure wind power and the level of hydro… oh, who are we kidding? It will be exactly as fun as it sounds: you just go down slides and tell your company if you had enough fun on it.
And these parks are all around the world, so your degree in tourism is all you will need.
Studied Veterinary Medicine? Become…
Don’t laugh this off, because it is quite serious. Ostriches are… let’s say they aren’t the brightest lightbulb on Broadway: they peck each other, they stuff their heads in the sand and they eat gravel to grind their food. That’s why you need a Master’s degree in veterinary science, if you want to babysit the world’s largest bird.
Look at this adorable dumb face!
Put your sword down, you’re not going to be an extra in Game of Thrones. You will just be responsible for keeping England from falling.
Walk in the park, isn’t it?
The legend says that, if the ravens from the Tower of London ever leave, the whole tower will crumble and the empire will disappear. That’s why the birds have a keeper, (presumably not a cat), whose sole duty is to take care of them and be certain they are well and dandy and that the world, as we know it, won’t fall into pieces.
Yes, this exists. And it’s awesome. Moving on…
Studied Medicine & Health? Become…
How can you know if your moisturizing cream has an effect or not? Well: by putting your hands all over a person’s face, in a move gentler than a probe, but harsher than a caress.
Yes: if you graduated a Master’s degree in medicine and health, you can go and work in a lab and then creepily touch a random person, in the name of science.
Studied Computer Science & IT? Become…
This may sound dangerous, but it is the exact opposite. Graduates of computer science and IT degrees can be paid by companies or by ordinary people to hack their accounts and systems.
By hacking the existing program, former students can see where the problems are and where the major weaknesses lie, so that they can be improved and future malicious hackings can be prevented.
Studied Engineering & Technology? Become…
Paint Drying Watcher
Well isn’t this a good use of your hard-earned chemical engineering degree?
Paint and lacquer industries need people who can observe the chemistry of drying chemicals. So, on a daily basis, engineers stare at a wall and, from time to time, in what can be considered “an eventful day” for their position, touch the wall and test its dryness.
Guys: Willy Wonka is real! Chocolate engineers are the masterminds behind the tools, equipment, recipes, and design of chocolate. It’s not just a matter of “I will eat this until I drop”, although you must imagine it is one of the perks.
No, chocolate engineers have to understand the equipment, the shipping conditions, the way the best chocolate is made, and how it should taste.
If this isn’t a dream come true for you, you should really re-evaluate your choices in life.
Get it? Chocolate engineers? Yes, I am a nerd. Why do you ask?
Study Humanities and become…
Fortune cookie writer
This title speaks for itself. If you’re a graduate of creative writing, you’re perfect for a career of quotes and funny anecdotes. So go write those 100 characters or less, and make a whole world read your funny quip, as they eat 378 calories of crispiness.
Nail polish namer
For those not familiar with the insane world of cosmetic names, you should be aware that the logic behind it beats me (“Don’t know, beets me!” being a colour in the OPI nail polish family).
Seeing how the sky is the limit (also 50 characters), you will be able to compile the best names for a diverse palette of colours, from Ladies & Magenta-men red, to I Have a Herring Problem blue, Teal the Cows Come Home teal, and A Good Man-darin is Hard to Find orange.
Studied Social Sciences? Become…
Chief listening officer
If your friends always praise your stalking abilities on Facebook, Twitter, or any form of social media platform, then this is the career you were meant to have.
The basics are these: you have to keep an ear out for what people are saying about the company that employed you and how it is perceived by the world. With a degree in communication or a degree in marketing, you can become one of the most in touch persons out there.
So, now that you know that a job isn't necessarily something you can explain in a few words or so, go print this list and attach it next to your screen, and consider it as an alternative every time an e-mail does not find you well.